Difficulty in relationships can be a huge source of stress and can impact our day to day life. When a relationship is strained or has broken down, counselling can be a great way to mend that relationship.

Difficulty in relationships can be a huge source of stress and can impact our day to day life. When a relationship is strained or has broken down, counselling can be a great way to mend that relationship. Relationship counselling provides a supportive environment to express fears and concerns and can assist with gaining clarity on what is important to you in a relationship and how to foster this in your current relationship.

Given the significance of the role that our partners, husbands/wives, family and friends have in our lives, relationship counselling is one of the biggest areas in which clients request support from psychologists and counsellors.  For many people, questions such as what a healthy relationship is, and how exactly do these relationships affect mental health are two of the most common issues in relationships.

By exploring patterns of communication, counsellors may be able to gain a greater understanding of the issue at hand. The counselling process may involve individual or group sessions in order to better understand the situation and provide active coping techniques to tackle relationship issues.

Relationship issues are highly correlated with symptoms of depression, anxiety, stress, self-esteem and anger. Given this, effective relationship counselling with a professional psychologist or counsellor is a core service provided by New Vision Psychology. Services such as couple’s counselling or relationship counselling may be the right move for you, to improve your relationships and overall mental health as a result of more positive actions.

New Vision Psychology provides Relationship Counselling services for ‘singles’, couples, married couples, couples experiencing separation, family relationships, child-parent relationships and same-sex relationships. If any of the following thoughts or emotions are familiar to you, please do not hesitate to contact New Vision Psychology to discuss whether our psychological services regarding relationship problems can assist you.

 

View FAQ’s View Case Studies

Relationship Counselling for ‘Singles’:

  • feeling lonely from not being in a relationship.
  • sad that all my friends are in relationships, but not me.
  • frustrated that I can’t meet the right person.
  • feel like I’m missing out.
  • feel like my milestones aren’t being reached (moving into a home with a partner, holidays with a partner, marriage, honeymoon, children).
  • feel judged by others for being single.
  • feel that there must be something wrong with me for being single.
  • keep attracting the wrong people.
  • keep attracting people who won’t commit.
  • why do I always stay in bad relationships?
  • I keep making the same mistakes in relationships (being too clingy, jealous, controlling).

Couples Counselling/Couples Therapy:

  • Sick of feeling resentment towards my partner.
  • Tired of all the fights.
  • Why won’t my partner look at my perspective?
  • Nothing is ever resolved.
  • We have different goals.
  • My partner is selfish.
  • I don’t like my partner’s friends.
  • My partner cheated on me. How can we move forward with this?
  • I feel distance from my partner.
  • I pick fights with my partner all the time.
  • I feel that I am not being prioritised.
  • My partner doesn’t listen to me.

Marriage Counselling:

  • We can go for days without talking.
  • I’m sick of the judgement, blaming and criticisms from my husband/wife.
  • My husband/wife is controlling.
  • There is no sex life.
  • We fight about everything.
  • I feel growing resentment and contempt toward my husband/wife.
  • Should I continue in this marriage or should I separate?
  • We disagree constantly about parenting.
  • We live separate lives.
  • Since we had kids, we have lost our intimacy.
  • I don’t know whether I still love my husband/wife.
  • We have become more like friends, not lovers.
  • There is no romance or affection in our relationship.
  • I have problems with my in-laws and/or extended family.

Relationship Counselling – Dealing with Separation:

  • Should I separate from my partner? I have had enough.
  • I am so angry with my ex-partner, I just want to hurt them.
  • I feel so much anger, sadness and resentment.
  • How will we arrange co-parenting?
  • What should I tell my children?
  • I feel like I have lost all that I worked for.
  • I’ve lost friends through the separation.
  • I’m scared of being on my own.
  • I’m scared of the financial problems caused by separation.
  • How can my ex-partner and I stay friends?

Relationship Counselling – Parent-Child Relationships:

  • Parents
  • My kids show me no respect.
  • They don’t listen to me.
  • My child has no motivation at school.
  • My son/daughter is lazy – they don’t help around the house.
  • My son/daughter is verbally abusive. I’m scared to talk to him/her.
  • My child is so moody, all we ever do is shout at each other.
  • I think my son/daughter is taking drugs. I don’t know what to do.
  • My teenager spends all their time on the internet.

Children/Young People

  • My parents nag at me.
  • My parents interfere with my life.
  • They are so controlling.
  • My parents treat me like a little kid.
  • They don’t understand, they think they know everything.
  • They judge me and my friends.
  • They don’t know me, but want me to listen to them and do everything that they say.
  • They are too protective.
  • They show no respect to me.

Through New Vision Psychology, our trained Psychologists and Counsellors can assist you with your relationship to make changes and progress through relationship difficulties, and provide family dispute resolutions. New Vision Psychology aims to be a positive support service during your time of relationship stress.

Frequently Asked Questions

Couples counselling give each person an opportunity to express their thoughts and option on what the issues are in the relationship. We help you derive common goals and values that have been forgotten due to ongoing conflicts and negative emotions. Couples counsellor/psychologist will assist you in developing mutual understanding through better listening and communication skills. This will allow you the opportunity to rekindle the kindness, compassion and love that have brought you together in the first place.

Couples who have had long term issues tends to cope with their distress by avoiding their relationship issues. It can often be very emotionally confronting to think about attending a session together. If both of you can get over this hurdle. The results of couples counselling can be far more rewarding than an individual session. Couples often report that after the first session they feel relieved that they have finally started to address their problems and they have a sense of hope and direction.

Couples can benefit from counselling when they feel that trust has been broken, when intimacy has diminished or when they feel that there is a communication breakdown. Others might simple feel that something is wrong and that the relationship doesn’t bring them joy and happiness anymore. It would be helpful to attend couples counselling to uncover the underlying concerns so that they can be addressed before serious problems develop.

Infidelity can cause intense emotional pain in the relationship and trust can be very difficult to rebuild. However affairs often happen when there are underlying issues within the relationship. Such as communication breakdown, loss of affection and intimacy, mental health issues like depression, physical health issues and additions to alcohol and sex.

These issues are often brought to the surface during counselling and when they are addressed, trust can be rebuilt and relationships can be strengthened.

On Average couples attend between 4- 12 sessions. The more open and willing one is at reflecting and changing themselves, the faster your progress will be.

Generally speaking couples counselling is aimed at overcoming the differences which will help work towards a happier and a stronger relationship. However, not all couples decide that staying together is the best way to move forward. On some occasions, couples may discover over the course of counselling that there are fundamental differences in values and direction and that each are likely to be happier if they were to be apart.

Case Studies

Sophie and Peter have attended sessions for relationship counselling. In their first session, the psychologist helped them each take turns to articulate how they experienced the relationship, and how their relationship currently makes them feel.

Peter began, and said that he felt that everything in the relationship was fine. He thinks Sophie is a good wife and mother, and that he still definitely loves her. Peter said that they argue sometimes, but he thinks this is normal. He said that it is Sophie who seems to think there are problems in the relationship, and this can frustrate him at times. He feels that he is already doing a lot (like working, looking after the children, and doing housework), and so does not know why Sophie is still unhappy with him.

Sophie stated that Peter’s response, where he does not know why she is unhappy, is part of the reason that they are in counselling. Sophie feels that she has been very clear about why she is upset, and Peter still doesn’t ‘get it’. She says that he ignores her in the evenings, and always seems to be preoccupied with something else. She also feels that he does not really want to speak to her anymore. Generally, Sophie feels that she is not prioritised in the relationship and that she and Peter act like friends.

With an understanding of how each person feels about the relationship, the psychologist now works to identify shared goals that the couple can aim towards. It is clear that Sophie’s goal in the relationship is to feel like Peter is prioritising her, which is demonstrated by spending quality time together. On reflection, Peter too says that he wants to have more quality time.

The couple agree that after work, they should set aside time to speak to each other (and not just to finish chores or watch tv). This could be by making sure that they sit at the dinner table and eat together, or to have a chat after the kids go to bed. The couple now have concrete plans to ensure that they stay connected and prioritise each other.

Future sessions will look at other ways to stay connected, like improving communication, ways to avoid misunderstanding, and how to navigate conflict (which is inevitable) in a useful way.