Do you often feel like you are on ‘edge’? Do you have a ‘quick temper’? Do you often feel angry, but not know why?

It is common for people to experience ‘anger’ as a primary emotion. This is not only uncomfortable for that person, but also for the people around them. There is always a reason for anger. It is important to give yourself time to explore and express this anger, so you can be unburdened from it. Counselling can assist with this.

Our psychologists and counsellors frequently work with people experiencing anger as a primary emotion. Our psychologists and counsellors understand that clients have valid reasons for their emotions, and that their frustration and expression of anger is often misunderstood.


Our psychologists and counsellors work with clients to recognise that while their anger is valid, their expression of it may not be effective in relationships and in the workplace. New Vision Psychology works with clients to teach them better ways to express anger – in ways that are effective and get their needs met, without causing conflict or further problems.

 

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Specialist Anger management services for men

Whilst issues of anger are experienced by both men and women, enquiries and services for anger management at New Vision Psychology are often on behalf of men. Frequently, male clients who receive anger management counselling with us have been referred by their wives, partners or work places.

Given the frequency of male clients experiencing symptoms of anger, New Vision Psychology is able to provide anger management counselling by psychologists and counsellors with experience in specialist men’s counselling services.

Please give us a call to discuss these specialist men’s counselling service.

Signs of problems with anger

  • you feel that you lose your temper easily, and for ‘little’ things.
  • your partner is scared of you.
  • your children are scared of your anger.
  • your workplace has provided feedback that your anger is an issue.
  • you are in trouble with the law due to anger (road rage, assault).
  • you ‘snap’ frequently.
  • you often feel regret when thinking about your anger.
  • it is hard for you to feel relaxed.
  • you feel that you lose control of yourself when you are angry.
  • you can’t seem to get your message across, and people misinterpret your frustration/anger.
  • you are often very angry in public (road rage, when waiting in queues).
  • your anger has led to domestic violence (whether physical, emotional or verbal abuse).
  • you are being ‘performance-managed’ at work after an incident involving your anger.
  • you feel stressed and embarrassed by your anger.

How we can help with anger management

We can assist with ‘anger’ by helping you to:

  • understand that your anger is valid, and is for a good reason;
  • recognise that while your anger is valid, some of the ways you express your anger may not be effective in getting your needs met.
  • explore triggers of your anger.
  • learn how to recognise early warning signs of your anger (e.g. shallow breathing, feeling hot, increased heartbeat, tense muscles, increased volume of your voice, shaking), and how to respond to these early warning signs by de-escalation.
  • explore ways to manage anger when you are triggered.
  • explore positive and effective ways to deal with frustration.
  • learn long-term management of emotions such that feelings of anger and frustration are managed as they arise, rather than allowing a build up of uncontrolled anger.
  • use anger effectively, that is, to stay in control rather than to let the anger make you ‘out of control’.
  • use anger effectively, for example, as a motivator.
  • use of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (scientifically proven psychological tool) to address anger issues.

Our counsellors have extensive experience working in counselling, using a wide range of evidence-based frameworks and therapeutic methods. A key principle of our therapy is to work collaboratively with clients to meet their individual needs. This is by working with the therapeutic method that best works for the individual client. Some of these methods include, but are not restricted to:

  • Client centred approach
  • Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
  • Mindfulness
  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
  • Psycho-education
  • Relaxation strategies
  • Interpersonal Therapies
  • Solutions-Focused Therapies
  • Psycho-dynamic approaches

Frequently Asked Questions

Anger is a normal human emotion. However, if you experience anger to a level where your family, friends or workmates have expressed concerns, then it might be a sign that anger is an issue, and you could benefit from counselling.  

Other signs might be if you have broken an item out of anger (such as your phone or computer), or if you have legal issues stemming from your anger.

Finally, if you fell ‘out of control’ because of your anger, then counselling should be considered for your own benefit.

Frequent anger, or ‘over reaction’ to a situation, is likely to have a negative impact on close relationships. Partners of people who present with anger may feel intimidated, powerless, confused and in severe cases, threatened.

Help is available through anger management counselling. Counselling assists clients to identify and understand their anger, and to learn better ways to deal with their frustrations, such that anger does not impact on their relationship/marriage.

Anger Management Counselling assists clients to understand the underlying reasons and triggers behind their anger. With understanding, clients are then better placed to manage their anger, and avoid triggering situations. Counselling also provides clients with practical strategies to manage their anger as it arises.

Counselling might also assist clients to better explain to their loved ones what is going for them, that is causing their anger. This might assist with developing more harmony within relationships through empathy and understanding.

Teenagers can find it difficult to express their emotions. They may feel sadness, shame, embarrassment or hurt, but be unable to identify these. Instead, they react with anger.

Parents and care givers have a role in assisting their teenager to verbalise their feelings in a safe and supportive environment. If teenagers are able to speak about how they feel, they may be less likely to react through anger.

However, it is acknowledged that teenagers may be uncomfortable or unwilling to speak to their parents about their emotions. In this case, it is recommended that a trusted family member (an aunt or uncle) or a family friend, might be able to offer this support.

Otherwise, counselling with a professional might be the best option, where a teenager can feel confident to speak about their private issues in a confidential environment.

The consequence for anger is usually the impact someone’s anger has on those around them (including their family, friends and workmates), as well as the impact anger has on themselves (feeling out of control, feeling tense, constant agitation).

Your psychologist will conduct an assessment with you during your initial appointment, to understand your situation and your particular presentation. They will then discuss with you how many sessions might be required for treatment. This is done in consultation with you.

However, as a rough guide, clients usually need between 6-10 sessions for anger management.

The causes of anger are varied from individual to individual.

With anger, what usually happens is that the client over the course of their life have become use to using anger as their primary way of expressing emotions.

So for example, if they are sad, they will express it in anger. If they feel ashamed, it comes out as anger. The same for other emotions like frustration, disappointment, being tired and so it. It all starts to come out as one big angry emotion.

Case Studies

David has been referred by his wife for anger management counselling. His wife is sick and tired of his moods, and is worried about the influence this has on their young boys. David recognises his anger, and also does not want his children to be influenced, but admits that he is still somewhat reluctant to attend sessions.

In the first session, because of David’s reluctance to attend, the psychologist spends a little more time trying to understand what David’s needs are, and to set counselling goals that are more meaningful to him.

During the session, it becomes apparent that his counselling goals are actually similar to his wife’s goals. That is, David wants to be able to be more calm on a day-to-day basis. This is for the benefit of his wife and kids, but also for his own benefit.

Sessions are then tailored to understand scenarios and situations which trigger David’s anger, and give him strategies to respond more calmly.